Just a few days ago, saya dibanjirin pertanyaan Wawing yang bikin sedikit mikir sebenernya. Rada2 males mikir sekarang siy… secara juga ngga ada calon-calon yang musti dipilih….:p
“Ichi, considering you are a woman (well…I am), which would u choose… whatever the situation,
a. cowo yang caring, sayang, menyempatkan waktu, dsb… tapi belom bisa teges/mampu membuat keputusan secara “matang” alias duitnya ngorek2 sana-sini… terus-terusan…(hihiyy…kesian amat yak??)
b. cowo yang kuat secara finansial, tapi punya sedikit waktu but afford with anything u want…
Uh well…here we go….^_^
Cowo “matang” pasti penting dong… buat apa full perhatian tapi cuma makan CINTA doang?? Not at all about matrealistic-stuff, money isn’t everything… tapi hayooo de cewe-cewe… itu cukup penting juga kan??? Tapi perlu diinget mungkin ini lebih ke konteks relationship yang bener2 serius, bukan yang sekedar I love U, U love Me…We are happy family… halah, itu mah lagunya Barney jaman gw preppy dulu kaleee….^_^
What woman wants??
Uhmm…assurance = asuransi….pasti….hahaha, but most of all we want to be loved and feeling secure. Ga bisa aja kalo disuruh milih choice a ato b diatas, mengingat manusia selalu ingin sesuatu yang ideal walopun entarnya juga practically susyeeehhh. It’s bull-crap if women said that they don’t need money… they’re gonna be picky (aren’t we??). Cowonya ga musti tajir se-alaihum… yaahhh, relatif siy… to a certain type of girls, yeap… but let’s talk about woman in general. Personally, kalo saya sebenernya cuma pengen nyari aman aja… dalam artian financially secure untuk masa depan nanti… *halah, kayak yg uda mw nikah aja*. Bukannya pengen “hanya” bergantung sama orang itu, saya juga nanti Insya Allah akan bekerja kok… tapi ngapain wasting time kalo uda keliatan orangnya males dan ga bisa support keluarga secara materi… Tapi kalo tajir trus kelemer-klemer ga ada attention juga yaelah… males banget juga. Hihi… maunya apa sih?? Kalo ada joke tentang difference and similarities between a girl and a PC… well, hampir bener juga sih. Gee… we’re not that difficult too handle though…. Tapi kalo pake melet-melet cowo tajir sih engga kaliii….
Tajir… based on my personal dictionary pokoknya pinter dan mau/bisa kerja. Udah….itu de yang penting. Kalo tajir harta emak-babe nya saya juga rada males, mending kalo yang bisa manfaatin. Tapi model-modelnya cuma ngandelin “minta-minta”…bakalan ga jaminan juga. Itu mah anak SMP yang bangga2an kalo punya pacar mobilnya segupre-gupre… Bukannya sok-sok-an, tapi cowo yang naek angkot sekarang tapi keliatan bakalan punya jaguar di masa datang keliatan lebih sexy dee… yaa, ga jaguar2 amat lah…^_^
Kalo ngomongin soal assurance, yaa…. Saling yakin soal hubungan itu sendiri kali yah. I’m not an expert about this by the way… tapi dari point of view seorang perempuan, cewe ngga mau effort dateng dari dia sendiri… Loveà it takes two to tango, iya gampang buat cowo…. He can walk out free whenever they want, and again seperti yang sudah kita ketahui bersama cowo (yang menurut saya sebenernya tipe begini…. Actually he’s not that into YOU…) kadang takut ama komitmen. Gw mah… hadouwww… ke laut de tipe beginian. Kenapa not that into you??? Karna kalo cinta dan uda nemu sama “seseorang” itu… mereka pasti akan melakukan segalanya… bukan begitu???Oprah yang bilang loh… cewe juga gitu kok.
Yaahhh….tapi sepertinya the easiest part of all sebenernya cewe kalo uda feel loved, bakalan lebih gampang…ga punya duit juga. Hahaha… iya gituh?? Di dalem otak cewe, affection emang penting sepertinya… just make us feel secure and save…then we’ll fall. Sama aja kayak cowo kan yah… as we all know, affair terjadi kalo salah satu ato dua-duanya ngerasa insecure…
Tapiii…………. ngomongin “hati” mana ada teorinya sihhh??? It’s all about emotional feeling, right???
Umpphh… saya juga sampe sekarang belom bisa jadi orang seperti yang saya inginkan, ato yg org pengenin... But the whole point is….Smart man is SexY *sluuuRppp*… hahaha…. Karna dia pasti tau gimana cara untuk jadi cowo tidak pada pilihan a ato b… tapi untuk dipilih…. Reckon so!!!
Happy note……
Just wanna share things I enjoyed these days…
Fictions run…. Music blast…. Joys of sleep….
Impressed so much with “Alchemist” by Paulo Coelho. Yeah… it’s not new.
Many people would classify this story as the best book ever written. It's hard to disagree…. The main character is about the boy who follow his dream. The story flows so simple and I couldn’t find any meaningless paragraph. If you haven't yet read this book, I STRONGLY encourage you to. There are SO MANY things you can learn and apply to every day life. It’s recommended everywhere, I guess…
“Memoirs of a geisha” is another nice book. I found it awesome becoz there are lotsa things I didn’t know before… Japanese tradition and a little touch of its history. Love those things…. The same feeling when I read “The Da Vinci Code”, except that probably I’d find more surprises in Dan Brown off course. I’m reading a collaboration novel by the indonesians blogger… PUING..death-stuff… By the way, I used to like Gibran at high school… but wooohhh….. tried re-reading Risalah Cinta and found it boring… ngga tau yaaa…. Maybe I’m on ALL-ABOUT-LOVE-BORED Syndrome…haha… Saya juga lagi penasaran sama “To Kill a Mocking Bird”nya Harper Lee, tapi nyari belom nemu…. Anyone??? Punyakah???
Into music…. Selain lagi suka sama lagu yang ngesoul kayak “Every little bit of Hurts”nya Alicia Keys (bukan liriknya loh yaaa… the piano and Keys’ amazing soul when she sings that falls me down), John Mayer Trio and John Legend for sure…
Saya juga cinta LETTO!!!! Kemaren pas sempet yg talkshow sama anak2 The Rain pun, saya teteupp nanyain anak2 Letto…hehe… yah, siapa tau kenal gituh kan sama Jogjanya. Began on a rainy night with a can’t sleep syndrome, saya ikutan quiz yg hadiahnya CD Letto… hehehe…ternyata dapet!! Got the album, listened to every songs…. Sampai mati, sampai mati is less interested but all of ‘em are super duper… U should try “Truth, Cry and Lie”…”I’ll Find A Way”.... ga punya??? Request yah di radio Makobu The Fresh Channel….hahaha…promosi de gw… Letto ini my-life-talk juga, beside Alanis tentunya… kebetulan mungkin, tapi iya juga. Letto ini kan basa Italinya bisa “tidur” (camera da letto = kamar tidur) dan bisa juga baca (ho letto = saya udah baca). Another coincidence kalo saya emang suka dua hal ini…. Tiduran sambil baca…hehe…. I wonder the band philosophy, why the heck they named it that way???
Uh well… tidur saya emang rada parah liburan ini. Tidur jam 11an tapi bangunnya bisa jam 9 pagi… huhu, pemalesan!! Abis solat… langsung selamat tidur kembali de. Abis lari pagi juga saya bisa terlelap di depan TV sambil nonton berita….. makanya sekarang kalo lari pagi suka yang jauh biar pulangnya uda bener2 siang dan ngga boleh tidur. Uhm….There is a time for many words, and there is also a time for a sleep. (^_^)
My first blogg...don't wanna mess up a good writing with some crap stuff just about myself...so here i am, writing becuz have no idea whattado rite now...
Really wanna sleep to save my soul. I would really, really love to sleep. So, this middle of the night awakening can only promise evolution for my soul… if not bags under my eyes (like I always have). U know I really love to express myself, in any form. I don't think twice about sharing how I feel about something or how broken I was, but sometimes getting specific is terrifying. As always, I enjoy so much my dreaming time… wondering!! ^_^ And right now… I wonder how they (my friends??famz?? people..)looked over me… am I really like what they see?? How often do I withhold from people my true experience? (like well-socialized girl??hehe..)
And how to go about this other wonder?? I just would love to have somebody (not a boyfriend if u guess so..), maybe a true bestfriend I could have on this planet..who asks me lotsa questions we could both wondering, a person who touched me and loves our relationship and when I just could ask them outrightly without having a hard feeling. A feedback taking soul who would land me some reactionary stuff… U know what?? Sometimes I wonder… am I going the wrong way?? I find myself inspired to speak a little more authentically about my fear, or my dissappointment (yuckkkk..i've never liked to admit my dissappointment) or all those human not-so-proud of things, and it loosened me a gut…huhu…I don't have a gut actually…but I just know that there is a great challenge for myself brewing underneath those ponderings…
Anyway, thanks for reading….
-C-
Hi all…
Just checking in as we approach official holiday time. Wishing you each the greatest of times with your family, friends or selves throughout this season.
This year starts in a weird way… don’t wanna be hopeless, but some unfortunate events are already written on my year’s first book. Last year was the same, u know… my life cycle (it’s still January..huhu), except that it’s becoming easier each year. Uhmm, maybe becuz I got used to it already.
Anyway, when I just take a few minutes to reflect and throw some personal goals out about the future… I get inspired by this happening… miss-decision making, cell-phone robbed, etc… yeah, I’ll be diving in and serve (not only for myself) the best. (^_^)
Okay… cukuplah sok bijaknya, ;p. Back to the holiday theme. Saya nganggur amat niy… bisa bangun siang, paling nunggu jam siaran trus beres2 rumah. Apart from it… saya emang jadi lebih rajin lari pagi dan rada jauhan gituh, pengen nyoba resep masakan enak, and I’m doing this orchid’s project… huhu… ga tau de berhasil apa engga. But it’s kinda fun tho’.. I find the clarity that leads to a great sense of peace and empowerment, haha… soalnya jadi mikirin banyak to-do-projects dalam rangka ngga nganggur. Read some books also, watch old-fave movies (Someone Like U… Love Actually… etc). Internally, even if I’m on my own… I feel surrounded by support and filled with gentleness and have some juicy time to enjoy on how awesome it is to be alive. Tentunya mencari kehidupan selain ngerjain tugas, merem-melek depan kompie, panas2an di jalan buat survey… before it is time to return again.
I have new friend coming in actually, and we talked a lot about journeys (adventures, books, life, projects, partners, anything...). Well, I don’t have any great gift to express… but I’ll offer a confortable friendship to support in your every journeys ^_^.
Anche se avevo l’esperienza con una gran schiffezza a farmi un casino quest’anno…. Hihiihihihi…… Great people are still involved in my support system…
Connect soon...
-c-
Had lovely conversations with some good friends which confort me a bit. The discussion was a lot about the merely fact that I actually am lying to myself… really wanna speak my truth, but u know sometimes u just couldn’t tell and all u wanna have is some empty spaces and silences.
I spend myself reading good books these days, especially when I really don’t wanna face up the “situation”… I absolutely into the point where the feeling is to defense myself, to protect myself… huuhhh…berlebihan sebenernya……just becuz I don’t wanna get dissapointed someday!! This thing encouraged me to leave becuz if I’d go it means deserting me. I have to run away…
Self protection was in times of true danger
My best defense is to mistrust and be wary
Surrendering a feat of unequalled measure
And I’m thrilled to let you in
Overjoyed to be let in in kind…
I’ve read the sign… (kata Paulo Coulho, dengarkanlah bahasa jiwa…^_^). Well, I’ve decided then… I chose, in the past, becoz I trusted my feelings....I compromised to be with that decision becoz my heart once..said yes it is… Trying hard not to regret things (we all do have that part, don’t we??). Kalo kata Wawing, my damn wise producer… never regret what we’ve decided in the past, coz it’s the best decision we take at that time. Future does have funny ways of showing itself…
Life has a funny way of sticking out on u
When u think everything’s okay and everything’s going right
Well… Life has a funny way too of helping u out
When u think everything’s gone wrong and everything goes up in your face…
(lagunya siapa hayooo….hehe…teteupp gw mah…Alanis gitu yah… -ironic-)
Helping u out… helping me out…
-c-
